I nisu bas vicevi, ali hajd'.
-What happened to the plant in math class?
-It grew square roots.
-Why wasn't the geometry teacher at school?
-Because she sprained her angle!!
-Why is a math book always unhappy?
-Because it always has lots of problems.
-Why did I divide sin by tan?
-Just cos.
-What does the zero say to the the eight?
-Nice belt!
There are three people applying for the same job. One is a mathematician, one a statistician, and one an accountant. The interviewing committee first calls in the mathematician. They say "we have only one question. What is 500 plus 500?" The mathematician, without hesitation, says "1000." The committee sends him out and calls in the statistician. When the statistician comes in, they ask the same question. The statistician ponders the question for a moment, and then answers "1000... I'm 95% confident." He is then also thanked for his time and sent on his way. When the accountant enters the room, he is asked the same question: "what is 500 plus 500?" The accountant replies, "what would you like it to be?"
-Teacher: "What is seven Q plus three Q?"
-Student: "Ten Q"
-Teacher: "You're Welcome."
-What do you get when you cross a linebacker with a computer geek?
-A linear programmer.
-What does the little mermaid wear?
-An algae-bra.
-Why is 6 afraid of 7?
-Because 7 8(ate) 9